Garrett-Evangelical Theological Seminary

It was windy and it was cold during my time in Evanston, Illinois.
But the feeling I got inside my heart was anything but cold.
With a gorgeous campus, a thoughtful, kindhearted staff, and a mission to know God and to help others know God, I was able to get an extensive look into Garrett-Evangelical Theological Seminary.

I want to first talk about the lead-up to getting there. I remember meeting Reverend Becky Eberhart, Director of Admissions, during my time at Exploration 2011 and seeing how warm and friendly she and the rest of the staff was. As the months have continued on, I've received letters (which in the Seminary world is extremely common) and emails (also a frequent occurrence) both of which helped keep me up to date about the happenings around Garrett but also about deadlines and such.

Note: So far, all of the seminaries have done this and I have found it so helpful. Yes, even amidst all the other emails I get on a daily basis. I encourage you to let the schools keep you on their mailing lists. It allows you to see what each school values and supports. After all that's what they're there for...to teach you!

The thing I loved most about Garrett before I visited, was that I received not one, not two, but three personal phone calls. Now these weren't just logistical, "let's get you to our school" phone calls. Instead, these were calls that I would receive from someone like a friend that I hadn't talk to in a while; someone who was sincerely interested in my life, my call and so they took 10-20 minutes to talk with me.

I really appreciated this.

 We were SO eager to get to Chicago.

(When I say "we," I mean me and my friend Katie. She was lovely enough to accompany me on this trip even though she has followed her own call that will take her to Asbury Seminary in the Fall. Go Katie!)

We ended up getting into town about 4-5 hours earlier than we had planned...what can I say? The coffee must have worked particularly well that morning! 

Luckily that wasn't a problem and actually turned out to be perfect timing because the 5th Annual Student Theological Conference was going on that day! This event was co-founded by Jason Gill who serves as Garrett's awesome Assistant Director of Admissions (and knowledgeable campus tour guide!) Because of his work, both in the office and with the current student body, we were able to learn about this year's conference theme, "Church & State"- a tricky topic for anyone to openly talk about, let alone a seminary. With eloquence, grace, and tact, Marci A. Hamilton was able to give us an insight into the world of government and church. I am so grateful for that new information.

Speaking of new information, Reverend Karla Kincannon spent part of our morning talking about all of the excellent Field Education and Spiritual Formation opportunities that Garrett has to provide. Every seminarian in the M. Div program participates in this. During your first year you will deal with the entirety of your calling and what that looks like for you ministry. Rev. Kincannon gave us an excellent quote that I hope helps you when you think about where and what you are called to do:

“The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet.” ― Frederick Buechner

Both the Field Ed. program and the spiritual formation class and the practices it teachers you, is for you to gain a deep clarity about what God has called you to do, about who He's called you to be. We were reminded of the Hebrew people, about how their calls weren't always crystal clear, that there were times when things were uncertain and vague. Garrett believes in the importance of nurturing our relationship with God and the reflection of the countless possibilities that that relationship opens you up to. That is the purpose these academic and spiritual courses seek to do: remind us and bring us back to where we're meant to be.

As with the other schools, we attended a class. Though there were no current students in the class with us, that didn't stop people in the group from pulling out their paper and taking copious notes- or in my case, taking notes for this blog. Dr. Jim Papandrea distracted me however, from doing my task! With his humor, his knowledge and his evident passion for teaching, he captivated all of our attention with information on the formation of the Christian Bible (not always an easy job I'd imagine.) He encouraged asking questions during the lecture, not just after which eased my mind, especially at such an academically profound school. We were told that Garrett is home to one of, if not THE most expansive and helpful libraries of all of the seminaries, which I kind of believe since as a student at the seminary you have full access to the Northwestern libraries, too!

We met Dean Reverend Cynthia Wilson and learned all about what it's like to be a student at Garrett.
The students of the school are probably some of the most diverse I've seen so far and because of this, there are several opportunities to get involved with different groups that they have established such as a women's center, centers for Latinos, Black Seminarians, Asian Americans, and couples. This was also the first school that has mentioned having a group for LGBTQ members.
As a Garrett student you have the option of three different kinds of worship services throughout the week and a weekly "community lunch" with your fellow classmates and staff. 

Next stop was the Chapel of the Unnamed Faithful.
Time of worship during these visits have consistently been my favorite part of each school. That time is always such a critical experience to me personally because each service is uniquely it's own. It is it's own representation of God and God's presence in that school.

The chapel itself was exquisite. High vaulted ceilings for perfected acoustics, stained glass for eye candy, and chairs gathered together to create community. On the campus tour that Mr. Gill led us on, he spoke of the unique stories the colorful glass tells about the Old and New Testaments; about the influential people that have been forever "set in stone" in the place.

To accompany the the beautiful scenery was beautiful music played by a small but mighty crew of three students. They didn't know it, but they played all of my favorites: Nothing But the Blood of Jesus, Hosanna, Come Thou Fount. I had goosebumps and chills during the entire service. The sermon was given by a current Masters of Divinity student who blew it out of the water! (I believe my exact words were "kick ass" actually. Can you say that about a sermon??)

And the gift of communion, of sharing it with other people on their own separate journeys was something that in that moment, united us.

Afterwards we were able to sit down with students at lunch that shared their experiences with us and opened the floor to any and all questions that we had. This time along with the dinner at The Celtic Knot (students only! :)) was an excellent time to relax and really get the inside scoop about life as a student. Which helps soften the anxiety-ridden time- at least for me- when the financial aid and housing parts come along. But take heart, despite the cost of higher education, the staff in the admissions office has plenty of ways to make it possible for you to fulfill your call. Check out Dollars for Scholars and don't ever be afraid to go to your local conference. Remember when I talked about gifts?? :)

We concluded our day with a tour of the Northwestern campus.
Like I've said, it is just absolutely breathtaking. From the Gothic towers to the Shakespeare Garden to the shores of Lake Michigan, God is present in that place and as students, you are encouraged to enjoy it!

Evanston is this town that is a little urban, a little hipster, a little classic, a little old fashion. It's a little bit of everything and I find it appropriate that that it is home to Garrett which so reflects that same kind of diversity.

One of the women who was visiting that day brought her young teenage son with her. Simeon (I'm pretty sure that's his name- I know it was one of the 12 awesome names of the sons of Jacob) didn't say much. He stuck to his drawings and was politely quiet during our order of events. But when it came time for questions, Simeon's hand shot up in the air with the fervor of curiosity and he ended up asking more questions than the group of 15 or so of us combined. 

I was in awe of this kids inquisitive mind and his excitement for Garrett.

With his question asking and his humble animation, I am thankful for Simeon.

He fits right in at Garrett.

Garrett is a place for those thirsty for academic and spiritual knowledge to be filled.

It's a place to be challenged and to grow.

It's a place to rejoice in diversity while learning from it.

Garrett is a wonderful place :)

To: & From:

I like to fancy myself a good gift giver.
She says so humbly... :)
There's something about knowing a person well enough that you know just the perfect gift to give to them; there's something about wrapping it in beautifully decorated paper or a bag and adding a bow just for that special touch. There's a feeling of excitement that comes with handing it to the recipient and seeing the curiosity dance across their face. And then finally, the big moment! Watching them as they open it up to see what is to them, from you.
Priceless.

I'm pretty sure I get this particular trait from my mother. One of her primary Love Languages is "receiving and giving gifts"- that's how she shows and gives out her love. Growing up, we kids would always get meaningful gifts for special occasions and also little trinkets from her for no reason at all except to remind us that we were loved and that she cared.

I've realized lately that as much as I love to give gifts, I'm not very good at receiving them.
If we were to utilize the several, some might call excessive, amounts of psychology class I've taken we could flesh that out a little.
Maybe there's a part of me that feels unworthy or selfish if I take something.
Maybe it feels like charity or pity.
In any case, I fight hard to resist people's attempts at giving me most anything. I've always seen that as my job.
Take last night for example:
I met up with two my favorite people...ever. We went on a driving adventure around Chicago- that's a completely different blog post in itself- and ended up at this wonderful little Greek place in a neighborhood outside of the city. At the end of the meal they insisted on paying. I got anxious and persistent in saying that I was fully capable of paying for my meal, that I could take care of myself.
But dear, sweet Leslie replied by saying, "We're doing this because when we were your age, this is what people did for us. And we're going to do it for you."

I think I've been missing the part of gift-giving that is an expression of taking care of people.
That's my job to do, but it's not only mine.
We are all care takers of each other, that's what we were created to do as a community of people.
I sat in on the chapel service today during my visit to Garrett-Evangelical Theological Seminary and during that time I received so many gifts that I never expected.
The service started when the band started singing "Nothing But the Blood of Jesus."
Do you know it?
If you do I bet you just started humming it. Trust me, I know it's hard not to!

What can wash away my sin?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus;
What can make me whole again? 
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.

 Then we took communion, the most powerful symbol of the ultimate gift there is. 

Communion and the meaning it holds to Christians is a gift that can never be matched and it can never be trumped.

But it is there for us. Wrapped in beautiful paper with a big bow on top.

Taking communion today was like one of those little gifts my mom would leave for me when I didn't expect it. 

It was a reminder to me that it is okay to be taken care of by others, by God. 

And more importantly that it is vital to our nature and well-being as humans to receive care.

The gifts that we are given don't always have to be in the form of a sacrament, though.

They can look like the listening ears of the good friends that we have.

They can look like the young college sophomore who talks openly and unashamedly about her faith with her parents sitting right next to her.

They can look like the curiosity, the unsureness, the questions we hold in our hearts.

They can look like the waves that crashed to the shore of Lake Michigan. 

Glory! Glory! This I sing—
Nothing but the blood of Jesus,
All my praise for this I bring—
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.

They are all gifts.

Gifts are all around.

We are all deserving of gifts; the gifts from God, to the wonderfully created, special you.

Humble Pie

In my Intersections of Race & Ethnicity class, we've been talking about this concept of Conocimiento (a little Spanish for all of you out there.) It's this 7-step Mestizo concept of introspective, self learning that requires horrible things to happen, for you to be filled with despair beyond imagine, to question your reality and then to learn your ethical and compassionate strategies from those experiences...sounds like fun, right?
The last part maybe, but the first part sounds AWFUL.
Learning about this concept and then being served a pretty hefty serving of Humble Pie all in one week forced me into the first part.
Again, no fun!

I've been nothing short of grim lately.
I've been surly and cold and insensitive and just mean.
Blame it on stress, blame it on life happenings, but either way, it's been terrible and not okay.
I've never good at asking for help. Delegating is not my forté and I get lost in being too busy.
For me it's easy to forget that I'm only human and that I can't do it all by myself.

BUT...
As painful as that blow from the humility stick was, it was needed.
I am not where I am because I'm just "so awesome" and know everything.
And I'm not here even just because of hard work and self-discipline.
I am here by the grace of my family even when I screw things up & make mistakes; by the grace of my mentor even when I don't heed her wisdom or advice; by the grace of my friends who are still there even when I just flat out suck; and most importantly by the grace of God, who wipes my slate clean, who walks with me and who loves me.

Every step in every journey is important and holds opportunity and hope to be better and to know Truth.
All of that said, Garret-Evangelical Theological Seminary in Chicago will be the next stop in my journey and I'm excited to see what lessons it has for me.

Gammon Theological Seminary

Have you ever watched an episode of Cheers?
Someone walks into the bar and everyone is just so happy that they're there? Smiles, and handshakes, and that strong positive greeting?
Welcome to my visit to Gammon Theological Seminary.




I spent a lot of time talking with Dean, Dr. Albert Mosley after I arrived on campus. He is a vessel for history and information that he loves to share with anyone and everyone- let him teach you! During this time I discovered that the school has a rich history dating way back to the mid-late 1800's. Originally, the seminary took the form as the religion department of Clark University in Atlanta, but later formed it's own institution. Currently Gammon is the United Methodist part of the Interdenominational Theological Center- ITC- which is home to the seminaries of several other different denominations including Baptist, Church of God, Presbyterian, African Methodist Episcopal, and Christian Methodist.


This was so interesting to me!!
We attended the student-organized chapel service which was filled with prayer, scripture and beautiful music and all of the various denominations worshiped together. And while it was different from what I'm used to, I loved it because it painted this beautiful picture of what Christianity could look like. This service let me see God differently and I am so thankful for that.
Even in their classes, these denominations are brought together to learn and to converse about their beliefs. And while, especially in the class that I was able to sit in on, there were strong opinions and disagreements, I still felt as though the students were learning from each other and taking in to consideration a viewpoint different from their own. In these classes, students are encouraged to voice their convictions but also to raise their doubts and to be shameless about it! This school produces proud and faithful "Gammonites," as they like to call themselves :)



Gammon has other opportunities to grow and apply your learning to the outside world. Through The Center for the Study of Religion and Race, you can choose from three different programs focused around different areas of spiritual growth. The one that spoke to me the most was the Racial Justice Institute which works to equip people of the church with tools that will allow them to confront and act upon racial injustice. Check it out- I know I will!

So you're thinking: this is historically an African American institution and you, Amy are...well...not African American.
Of course, I'll give you my response to that:
Initially, I was really apprehensive about visiting Gammon. I knew that my preconceived ideas of what the school itself would be like had somewhat clouded my hopes of the visit. So I had to throw out the rule that I made up for myself that said, "Oh I'd never go here," "There's no place for me here." And I was right to do so because the eight hours I spent on campus were some of the most enjoyable that I have spent in a long time. I learned, I worshiped, I laughed, and I shared- none of which I could have done without breaking down my assumptions and just being present where I was.
In that space, I did not see color; it was impossible to even try. Instead of looking for the differences, it was profoundly easy to see that our common thread was this love for God and for exploring our calls. I didn't feel like a brown person in a sea of black, but instead I just felt like Amy among Clement, Dean Mosely, Derek, Kevin, Tariq, Elyse and countless others. There was that feeling of being accepted despite being different...and that's the key.
You have to know, as I learned, that the Gammon community is open to everyone with a heart for ministry and they will welcome you and your call with great warmth and love.



I relaxed...for the first time in weeks.
I found wise and revered guidance from a new friend.
I learn what a "hush puppy" is...!
And I found another piece of the puzzle that I have been looking for throughout this journey.

This day was a Holy day.
& Gammon is a wonderful place :)

Candler School of Theology

Atlanta in itself is a beautiful place.
There's this perfect balance of suburbia with the beautiful houses, the tree-lined streets that wind up hill and down hill with parks and picket fences; but there's also this great city life where the different parts of town come alive through live music, countless numbers of small businesses in areas like Little Five Points, Midtown, etc. where you can find anything you want to eat, buy or look at all within walking distance. There's the space downtown that holds the CNN headquarters, the famous Atlanta Aquarium and iconic eateries like The Varsity.
And while I have attended all of these places, one of my most favorite places in Atlanta is Emory University, home of the Eagles, and home to Candler School of Theology!



We gathered in the Admissions Office with Candler's Associate Director of Admissions, Kerr Ramsay. He started by explaining the "World of Candler" in one sentence that really encompasses what I feel the school is about. He said this,
"It would be easy to make everything the same, but that's not the point."
What a way to start the day!
We "meeted and greeted" each other and then learned all about the exciting and bold things Candler has to offer it's students.
At Candler, all students take their core classes together. They do this because they feel as though it's important for everyone to be on the same basic page, to build a solid theological foundation before moving forward. Color me impressed!
They also require TWO years of field education working at some kind of community center and then working in a local church setting so that the things students learn in class can be made real by actually doing it.
A couple of the classes described to us really stuck out to me. For instance, Candler requires a World Religion class for the Masters of Divinity degree. They value the importance of the conversations and the growth that happens when those of other cultures and religions take time to understand each other. It's vitally important, especially in this time, that those in ministry are well-rounded, "outside of the West."
Along with these classes, some certificate programs, and a faculty partnership with the Desmond Tutu Center in New York City, Candler presents several dual-degree programs through Emory- one of the perks of being affiliated with a larger University! This could be so helpful if there's a super specific area that someone has been called to and provides an opportunity to further narrow their academic and spiritual focus area.

...Whoa. That was a lot of stuff.

From that meeting we got to choose a class to go to. I have to admit, I was a bit of a follower that morning just because I wasn't feel very confident in my navigation skills (or lack there of) so I joined the majority and went to the Old Testament II class taught by Dr. Joel LeMon (no, not Lemon). I was so glad I did because not only is this one of those core classes that I was talking about earlier that everyone has to take, but I got to play scientist and observe the class to see how the students interacted.
I saw a large majority of them were young adults but make no mistake, there were older folks in the room and they were just as engaged and excited as their other classmates. I saw everyone soaking in information, laughing at the professors jokes, contemplating what all of this means in their own lives and ministries. It was a perfect picture of discernment.
I was sitting there and I started thinking...
As I continue to think about where to go for seminary-which, let's be clear, is still very much up in the air- I actually got worried. And not so much worried about the work load or relocating to a new place or finally having to realize I'm like, a big kid now; but I worry about what seminary will do to the belief system that I've been building for 2+ decades. I wonder if sometimes I let my own beliefs of theology impact the expectations that I have when thinking about the different schools. Then as I thought more about it, I started to realize how much I was doubting the strength of my own stance and my own sentiments about faith.
So if I'm so worried about finding the "right" school with the "right" beliefs, am I really open to the process that seminary is offering regardless of where I end up?
What I saw in the classroom at Candler were students that were trying to figure out what "right," looks like for them and the more I went about my day on campus I found that each student does it differently. But they still cling to their community of seminarians and staff and faculty to support and guide them.

Again...a lot of stuff.

The rest of the day was wonderful.

We went to chapel to experience what their service was like. Spanish, Korean, African Spirituals, traditional hymns- you name it, they did it. It was like being on a Christian Small World ride at Disney. There were moments of meditation and prayer, beautiful solos and harmonious congregational singing. It was probably one of the best parts of that day for me.



Later we were led through the blooming campus, past the Tuesday Farmers Market (yum!) and into the dining hall by two current students to lunch and were able to talk about what it's like for them to be in school at Candler. When asked about the concept of Spiritual Formation, one student said that there's really no formal approach to it, but rather it is experienced through things their chapel services and a supportive staff. She said that the students are the ones who are responsible for their own spiritual formation and that there are plenty of healthy and available opportunites to make that happen, you just have to be open to them.
Afterwards, I attended another class, Theology of Wesley & Methodism with Dr. Rex Matthews. Now talk about interesting! And maybe a little controversial? I liked that a lot.

Meanwhile, back at the Admissions office...
As we wrapped up our visit, Mr. Ramsay was able to give one of the kids in our visitors group, who happened to be an admitted student, an envelope telling him he had just received a full scholarship to Candler! Yay! And not only was this kid really excited, but so was Mr. Ramsay! He said one of the best parts of his job was to tell people that their calling would be possible. Now if that doesn't say something about the school, I don't know what does. I feel like there will be a running trend with all of these admissions directors: the joy of giving people money :)
Moral of the story? Don't ever be afraid to ask these people for the help you need to get to where you feel you should be! They want to help you- they LOVE to do it.


Candler has this way of encouraging their seminarians to grow deeply into this intellectual and spiritual place to which each of them has been called; to further explore the diverse gifts that they have and utilize them for not only the betterment of the United Methodist Church, but also the surrounding Atlanta community and the extensive world.
The people at this school are happy and proud to say that Candler's staff, faculty, and academics are "second to none." And I am blessed to say that I could be a part of that for a day!

Candler is a wonderful place :)

Such a mess.

The hope was that Atlanta would be like this magical space where the uneasiness in my heart and soul would disappear and where my confidence level would begin to rise again. I hoped that it would wipe away everything that was back home. Let's see how that worked out...

The night before my Candler visit, I got a solid 3 hours of sleep. Boo!
And when I got to Emory's campus I was all kinds of turned around. I missed the door to the Admissions Office, lost my parking ticket, couldn't find the elevator. Ahhh!
HOT.MESS.

But when I finally got settled into our Meet & Greet time, one of the first things Candler's Associate Director of Admissions said was, "We do messy here. Messy is OK." I remember smiling and exhaling.
Then I came to Gammon, after spending 4o minutes in traffic and running late.
Same old story.
But through out the entire day, I kept hearing, "we want you," "we claim you," "Come back, you're more than welcome!"
That warmed every inch of my being.

In various moments, Atlanta has done the job I had intended it to: When I'm out eating pizza with my brothers(or tacos or burgers); when I'm trying dominate ATL's death trap...err I mean freeway; or when I'm meeting new & lovely people at these schools.
The visits I've made this week have reminded me that you don't have to be fully put together, have your ducks in a row if you will, in order to be worth something. It's in those "messy" moments that you realize just how much others care and how they understand what it feels like. These are the times that strength emerges and you can grow more fully into the person you were created to be.
And though they're hard times, trying times, there's undeniable beauty in them that sometimes only others can see (and I'm beyond grateful for the one who saw it in me today.)

Embrace that messiness. Use that messiness to fuel your journey forward.
We're ALL messy.
And we're ALL wanted and claimed.

As for the rest of my time in HotLanta, well that's reserved for my brothers :)
I'll be posting about each school later next week, so keep an eye out!

Slow Down.

You know it's gotten to a certain point when it's your dentist who's the one suggesting that you "reduce the stress" in your life and that it would be wise to "take bed rest."
My initial reaction was to just laugh while thinking, Lady, please. If you slow down you die.
To be honest, though, I didn't realize just how much I have had going on until I took ten minutes to sit down to consider why in the world I would need bed rest.
Despite that fact that I kind of live in my car, it's not like I don't see my friends and family, or have fun while I'm with them. I know how important it is to take care of myself and have time to do the things I want to do.
But I'm also constantly reminded about how much needs to be done; that those things have deadlines and that they affect other people- this is also known as responsibility. Blah.
I'm afraid that if I slow down, my motivation to keep pushing forward will cease.

After a conversation with my friend Brittany, I realized just how much stress is both an external and internal thing.
While going, going, going, all day, every day wears on your physical being and makes you drop-dead, drag-out tired, the way that what's going on in your mind affects your being, your soul is just as dramatic. I forget that even when I'm not physically moving, my mind is making up for it.
Even sitting here writing this post my mind is in every direction:
Holy CRAP, it's finals week.
When is that water bill due?
I am soooo nervous for Spring quarter.
Is my family safe?
Dating can be so overrated.
Did I remember to put that kids sippy cup back in the fridge?
I hate this song that's playing.
Am I doing well enough?
I would rather chew glass than go see a doctor!
What's the next step!?

So how do you do it?
How do you take time to regroup, to process but also get everything else in the world done?
Which battles do you choose to fight?
Where is the line between how much you can give before there's no more left?

I'm bound and determined to find that balance- which just adds another thing to my To-Do list, haha!
The balance between being a learning, growing, faithful disciple of Christ and the 21-year old girl that enjoys being with her friends, reading for fun, drinking a glass (or two) of D'Asti Moscato, and saying "to hell with it all! Let's just have FUN!"

I'll be on my way to Atlanta to visit both Candler School of Theology & Gammon Theological Seminary in just one short week. This week serves as my Spring break so while I'll be there for "business," I'll also be spending time with my awesome brothers and hopefully just kicking back and enjoying being in Georgia.
It will be a balanced trip: work & play.